23 10 2006

what a weekend. Sean is slowly killing me lately.  He’s dreadfully unhappy at work, which of course, carries over into the other aspects of our life.  He comes home critical and defensive, not an awesome combination.  It’s as though I can do nothing right lately.  not at school, not at home, I really hope that he just doesn’t realize how horridly he speaks to me lately.  I mean, just constantly critical.  And for someone who’s primary love languages are touch and words of affirmation, this is not working out well for me.  I barely felt as though he liked me this weekend, much less was in love with me. 

How have our parents done it?  How do people last, going through these times where things are hard and everyone is unhappy?  Is it realistic to expect one person to be able to fill our needs for the rest of our lives?  I just don’t know anymore. 

I can’t talk about this to anyone here, Marjie is gone, not coming back until February now.  I don’t know what I’ll do.  And it seems so damn disrespectful to air these thoughts outloud to anyone.  Disrespectful of him, of our marriage, of the things I’m holding tightly to for no apparent reason.  Wow, a little much this morning, huh? 




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